Another Chapter Closed

I really don’t know how to begin writing this because frankly my head is still spinning.  My mother… disposed of my wedding dress.

This is stemming from something that happened a month ago. She wasn’t invited to a wedding, and according to her, it was my fault she wasn’t going.  I dropped the ball.  In reality, no one from “that generation” was invited to the wedding. A multitude of other grievances were tied into that, as well.  For example, she said I never called… but I did.  Her answering machine is broken, and she knew that.  I told her repeatedly to fix it.  She said that she would get around to it. Yet it was my fault.  “You never call me.”  Okay, laundry-listing this way is tedious.  I’ll move on.

It all culminated on her birthday when we called to set up dinner for that evening and she completely blew us off and didn’t want to see me on my birthday either.  She was passive aggressive and downright nasty, as Patrick and I sat there listening. I remember getting off the phone and Patrick asking me what the hell that was. I told him I had no idea. I was in in complete shock.

Honestly, if someone were to ask me why this happened, I wouldn’t be able to give you a straight answer. I could recount the events leading up to it, but it’s so nonsensical, I can’t even wrap my brain around it.  I don’t understand how things devolved in such a way.

Anyway, Patrick called her this afternoon because he and I both agreed I could not speak to her, and I could in no way handle speaking to her. He just called me.  She wasn’t there, so he had to leave a message.  And guess what?  She called him back and proceeded to tell him:

• He’s a moron and a retard.
• Our wedding is a joke.
• He has no idea who he is marrying, and one day he’s going to find out.
• I’m a terrible person.
• I’m crazy.
• Our wedding is ridiculous.
• There’s a reason why my parents hate me.
• My wedding dress is not her problem.

Any time Patrick said anything in defense of himself or us, she cried harassment.

I know you can’t choose your family, but wow.

I don’t think I have ever been so depressed as I am right now.  I know that, no matter what, I’ll look beautiful on our day, but her malicious behavior cuts me to the core.  And once again, there’s that nagging voice in the back of my head going, “Well, maybe she’s right.”  I know intellectually that she isn’t right, but it’s horrid to hear your own mother say those kinds of things.  I am, however, thankful that I have amazing friends who have been so kind today. I love you guys so much.

Tonight, however, I’m going out to Old Town with Patrick to relax and have a drink or three.